Petition to convince Punxsutawney Groundhog Club to let Punxsutawney Phyliss live forever, just like her husband

by Countdowntogroundhogday on October 10th, 2022

Punxsutawney Phil is one of the most famous Groundhog Day forecasters in the world, arguably THE most famous one.

Since the mid 1880s Phil has been providing a winter prognostication on February 2nd, informing the world whether there will be an early spring or not.

Although most groundhogs in captivity live, on average, 10-15 years, Phil is a whopping 135 years old!

It’s not just a healthy diet that keeps the world’s preeminent groundhog kicking, it’s also the fact that every summer Phil is given a sip of the magical ‘Elixir of Life’, which extends his life another 7 years.

Now Phil living forever is all well and good, but the thing is, he’s not alone in this world. He’s happily married to another groundhog named Phyliss. “Why would that be a problem?”, you might wonder. “Surely the Groundhog Club must also give Phyliss a sip of the Elixir of Life each year too”, you might think.

You might think that, but if you did, you would be wrong.

According to the FAQ on the official Punxsutawney Groundhog Club website, Phyliss is NOT given the magical potion that would extend her life. As stated in the FAQ, “She doesn’t receive the Elixir of Life so she will not live forever like Phil.”

When we recently read this sentence, we here at Countdown to Groundhog Day were shocked! This means that sooner or later, Phil will have to watch his beloved partner die, and, likely right in front of his eyes, since they share a home at the Punxsutawney library. Not only that, but he’ll be forced to live with that memory and the loss of the love of his life, for all of time, since he is essentially immortal.

How could the Groundhog Club justify denying Phil’s wife immortality? How could they justify the pain that they’ll undoubtedly be causing Punxsutawney Phil when his wife dies? Phil has presumably found the love of his life – why should he have to lose her just because the Groundhog Club members are being stingy with a magical potion.

Maybe the ingredients to the elixir are rare. Perhaps it is time consuming to develop it. Nevertheless, Phil gets a sip of the potion each year. It can’t be that rare, or that difficult to make. There’s never been a year when Phil didn’t receive it as far as we know.

It’s not like Punxsutawney Phil is an action star who needs a new love interest every single movie. He’s not James Bond, Indiana Jones, or even Austin Powers. This is real life! There’s absolutely no reason not to give Phyliss a sip of a magical potion that will prolong her life indefinitely. There’s absolutely no reason to allow Phyliss to die when the key to giving her eternal life is readily available.

Is there something we’re missing? Is there some reason that Punxsutawney Phil is required to experience profound loss and eternal sadness? Will that somehow make him more powerful? Will it make him more accurate in his annual predictions?

We don’t think so. So that why we’re asking – no, why we’re begging – the Punxsutawney Groundhog Club to reconsider this harsh decision. We’ve even started a petition to ask them to give Phyliss the Elixir each year. If you agree that Punxsutawney Phyliss deserves to live, if you agree that Punxsutawney Phil should not be forced to witness his wife die, then please consider signing the petition as well.

Punxsutawney Groundhog Club, the ball is in your court. Please make the right decision.

Tags: groundhog day, petition, punxsutawney, Punxsutawney groundhog club, Punxsutawney Phil, Punxsutawney Phyliss